2023 has been a transitional year for many of us, including myself. I chose renewal as my word of the year, and it was perfect for me. After the two-year nightmare of my mother’s illness and death, renewal was exactly what I needed.
My past won’t let me escape easily, despite my tremendous growth. Nevertheless, I won’t let it drag me backwards. I don’t care how hard I have to fight.
When you’ve lived long enough, you understand that nothing in life comes easy. You have to fight and claw for every inch of ground you gain.
I understand that all too well. It’s taken years for me to give myself permission to be who I am, and not who someone else expects. It’s both exhilarating and terrifying!
Moving Forward
When you have a breakthrough and start living as a new version of yourself, you will face opposition. I guarantee it.
Many people from your past don’t want you to change, especially if they are toxic. They’d much rather you stay the same unsure, dependent person you were. Why? Because you are much easier to control that way.
Change anyway.
I had a huge personal breakthrough two weeks ago. It was a moment where everything I’ve learned in therapy finally came together in a satisfying click.
Have you ever had that happen?
It was amazing, but right after that breakthrough, I had a series of events that made me wonder if I had progressed after all. I faced opposition at every turn, and it was demoralizing. I felt like my legs had been knocked out from under me.
Several toxic people from my past popped up and contacted me. They were still relating to the old, insecure version of me, and it shook me. I can’t believe I ever related to people that way. The temptation was there to regress, but I didn’t.
Confidence is Beautiful
I refuse to ever again change who I am again to please someone else. People can like me (or not) for who I am. I love who I am, and I don’t want to change.
Loving yourself is the first step to change!
I won’t put up with bad friends anymore. They aren’t doing me a favor by talking to me—they are lucky to have me as a friend. If they walk away, it’s their loss.
When people leave, let them!
And finally, I insist on being paid well for my talents. Creatives have bills to pay too. I work too hard for someone to skip out on paying me in full for a job, and then have the gall to ask me to do more work for them.
You deserve to be well paid for your work.
Whenever you have a huge breakthrough, you will be tested, so don’t be surprised. But it’s a new day, and I’m a new person. Those old patterns are in the past.
I would rather be confident and authentic than bow to pressure to conform. My integrity is more important than being liked.
When you understand that, your whole world view changes.
And guess what? People treat you the way you treat yourself. So, if you want to be treated with respect, you must first respect yourself.
New Year, New Start
You can make the same changes and decisions I have. It won’t be easy, but it is so worth it. The new year is a great time to start fresh.
I’m looking forward to 2024. My word for next year is joy, and I intend to lean into it!
I like this idea much better than making resolutions. It sets the intention for the year, then you can make smaller goals as you go.
Do you choose a word for the year? Let me know yours in the comments.
Thank you for reading. I wish you a very happy and healthy new year in 2024!
My word for 2024 is Ikigai